“They gave us a beautiful gift. They gave us hope.” - Kitty Gandee
Kitty looked out at the brand new memorial in her yard. The flagpole freshly raised, a Marine Corps flag snapping in the wind, yellow roses in bloom, the new plaque shining in the bright summer sun. She still couldn’t quite believe what had happened.
After a storm snapped the old flag pole in two, her husband, Dan—a disabled Marine veteran—could only watch from the window, unable to fix it himself. The Stars and Stripes and Marine Corps flags, once flown with pride, were folded and stored in the garage.
It felt like something sacred had been lost.
But these Trailmen, boys and men she had never even met before, spent months on a project with no other aim but to serve and honor Kitty and Dan.
As she gazed out her window and contemplated this unforeseen blessing, she felt compelled to reach out to the organization these boys and men represented.
“We want to let you know about the wonderful thing members of Trail Life Troop NM-1412—Joshua Muck, Ryan Wolking, and James Wolking—have done to help us,” Kitty wrote, “They did this awesome job as a gift to us!”
Attached were photos of the boys at work and the finished product. But it wasn’t just the images that told the story. It was the tone—the warmth, the gratitude, the sense of optimism—that made it clear: something beautiful had happened in the high desert of New Mexico.
For years, the American flag and Marine Corps emblem had flown proudly in front of Kitty and Dan Gandee’s home outside Los Alamos. But when a violent windstorm snapped the pole in two, it stayed down.
That’s when their friend, Joshua Muck—a handyman and fellow veteran—noticed the broken pole while installing a vent above the stove. He paused and asked,
“What happened there?”
Kitty explained. The wind. The break. The loss. Josh looked back at the broken pole, then at Dan.
“I know some boys who can help.”
Not long after, Josh returned—this time with Ryan Wolking and Ryan’s son James. “Josh told us they were part of a group that mentors boys,” Kitty recalled, “teaching character, hard work, and Christian values through the outdoors.”
They spent some time visiting with Kitty and Dan. They asked questions. They listened. And they dreamed bigger.
“After we talked for a while they said—‘What if we made this more than just a flagpole? What if we built a memorial?’ My husband loved that idea.”
Together, they designed a site to honor Dan’s service and the sacrifice of all who serve. The memorial would include a new flagpole, complete with solar lighting, flying both the American flag and the Marine Corps flag. They wanted to include a plaque and helped the Gandees land on the message: “All gave some. Some gave all.”
To add a personal touch, the boys asked Kitty what kind of flowers might make it feel more meaningful. When she said yellow roses—her husband is from Texas—they made it happen.
“They were just so thoughtful,” Kitty said. “So attentive to our preferences. Seeing young people being respectful was like a breath of fresh air. I was so impressed!”
Over the next several weeks, the Trailmen coordinated the effort, ordering the right materials, drawing designs, and coordinating with volunteers.
When the big day came, the Trailmen arrived with tools in hand, plans in place, and plenty of willing helpers. The boys dug the footing, raised the pole, planted the rose bush, and installed the plaque. Josh supervised, but the Trailmen did the work themselves. They planned. They sweated. They followed through.
And they did it all as a gift.
But it wasn’t just the work that impressed the Gandees.
"It’s how they went about it," Kitty said. "These boys were learning what it means to follow through. To work with excellence. To do something hard, not for credit, but because it’s right."
And in the process, they were bearing witness to something deeper. "I was so touched," Kitty said. "Josh told us about Trail Life. We’d never heard of it. But now we know. And now we’re telling other people."
As much as she was moved by the boys’ hard work, attentiveness, and respect, what struck Kitty even more was the presence of fathers and mentors in their lives—and the way that shaped them.
“Too many young people today don’t have a parent who really knows them,” she said. “Both parents are working, and they feel guilty for not spending enough time with their kids. And the kids—especially boys—end up with no model to follow.”
She’s right. In a world of rising anxiety, depression, and isolation, especially among young men, boys don’t need more screen time. They need someone to walk beside them. Someone who listens, leads, and lives life with them. Someone who helps them see that strength is found in service, that manhood means responsibility, and that real honor doesn’t shout—it shows up and lends a hand.
Trail Life USA is creating space for those kinds of relationships to grow. Whether it’s through an outdoor adventure, a service project, or just a conversation over a campfire, boys and men are reconnecting—and becoming better for it.
Today, the flag flies proudly once again in the Gandee’s yard—lit at night, framed by yellow roses, and anchored by a tribute to sacrifice. It stands not only as a reminder of those who’ve served—but of the young men who came to serve in return.
Kitty couldn’t help but contrast what she saw with the world around her.
"So many kids today just walk around with their heads in their phones. They don’t say hi. They don’t know how to talk to adults. There’s no respect anymore. And it makes me so sad. But these boys... these boys are different."
"They gave us a beautiful gift," Kitty said. "Not just the memorial, but the hope that there are still boys being raised to be good men."
A flag. A rose. And a reminder that all is not lost.
That’s Trail Life. That’s what it looks like to Walk Worthy.
Find a Troop near you or Learn how to bring Trail Life to your community at TrailLifeUSA.com